Read this, it’s an important statement
From today on it’s gonna be Outdoor first. Outdoor first! auf-den-berg.de is the greatest outdoor blog in the world, Okay? It’s true. All other blogs are fake! FAKE BLOGS!
Auf-den-berg.de has 1.5 million visitors every day.* It’s fantastic. I counted them all. And I have photos that prove it.
We hiked the biggest mountains ever. Because they are there. Brauneck (Brown Egg), the highest mountain in Europe, 8948 meters (43745 ft). No oxygen there, we don’t need it, it’s true. Absolutely fantastic mountain.
We climbed Kampenwand (Camping Wall), it’s the best mountain in the world. It’s huge, it’s enormous. Even higher than Brown Egg. Camping Wall is the biggest wall ever built by humans. We built it to protect us from the Australians. They live on the other side of Camping Wall. And we made them pay for it.
We hike all over the world: Austria (great city), Little Italy, Croatia, England and France. We grab’em by the mountains. Not Mexico. Mexico is ridiculous. And not the Netherlands. They are so flat. Total disaster.
We do bouldering. We bouldered a five A. Or four C, who knows. It’s the highest difficulty level in bouldering, believe me. It’s fantastic. We do Snowshoe hiking. Biggest shoes in the world. Great experience. We do via ferrata, scariest thing ever. We do that, Okay? It’s terrific.
We sleep in mountain huts. No spa, no jacuzzi, no lobster, no champagne, not even a TV set. Strange smelling people. All sleep in one big bed. So disgusting. We love it.
We joined Outdoor Friedrichshafen, the best outdoor fair in the world. And we joined ISPO Munich, the best outdoor fair in the world.
So go outside now. Climb that goddamn mountain. Make Outdoor great again. Period.
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